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Casual Sex My Arse.

So, yeah. My last blog post seemed to arouse the thought of casual sex in my readers minds. Or someone doesn’t know that all comments are screened before publication. Tsk! You perverts!

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Festive Seasonalities

Y’know how nuts are festive? Well, today i ate some walnuts. Which weren’t from asda. Friggin walmart. Anyway, the first nut looked all icky and black inside, then second one tasted funny, and i couldn’t break the third one. So, i do what any self-respecting human would do. I reached for the nearest blunt object. This object happened to be a 2l bottle of water (half-drunk), which apparentnly smashes walnuts REALLY well. The only problem is, i have to get up to find the bits of walnuts spread around the room. My solution to both problems is thus- a gravity-based nutcracker. Or a really heavy one. Or just buy some peanuts instead.

Or hire a squirrel to do it.